Embracing Doro: A Journey of Self-Discovery

My big brother, my saviour

A hot Austrian day. I remember the seagulls of the Danube singing songs for freedom. These beautiful winged beasts are so harshly misunderstood. I remember on that hot Danube day, I felt close to them. I had fed on the scraps of a broken marriage. It was time for Doro to be free.

My wife had taken our children away. I told her the truth. I came out, and she took our gifts to the world away from me. I was irresponsible. I was a liar. I was the lowest of the low. My truth, my reality, made me a foul creature. I was left alone in a hotel room. Alone to find who I am.

What they said would happen did happen. Those who knew told me that life would be very lonely for me. They were right. I lost everything.

Although, there were small nuggets of hope in those early transition years. Little breaks in the clouds. Eyes in the storm that opened wider with every encounter. A regrouping of a dispersed hope.

My brother Yuri is my best friend. If ever we were to meet and you asked me what my favourite memory of him and I was, I would keep you for hours and smile wider with every story. We spent our youth in revolt. He and I were as close as siblings could be. We stole apples from orchards together, and we would ride horses through the fields. He called me his sister discretely since we were fifteen.

As I type this, I feel the gushing flow of love through my veins. I do so adore my big brother. My parents named him Yuri after Yuri Gagarin. My father believed one day that he would reach the great heights of Gagarin, and as usual, my father was right. I am proud.

It was two years after my coming out. I was at the threshold of thirty. I had brought Doro to light and wasn’t keeping her to myself. The world would know me. I was here. I was true to my heart. I was not out of the woods.

My marriage had reached its first fever pitch. My wife would scream at me, and I would let her. I felt I owed her reparations. By transitioning, I had committed a war crime in the battle of love. I owed it to her, or so I thought.

We were on our annual trip to Batumi, Georgia. We went as a family. A whole…

...to be continued.

Related Posts

From Train Spotting to Quantity Surveying: A Journey of Passion and Precision


Discover the fascinating journey of a quantity surveyor whose early passion for train spotting paved the way for his career. This story is a testament to how our childhood interests can shape our future, often in ways we least expect. Dive in to explore the parallels between train spotting and quantity surveying, and how these activities share a common thread of travel, organization, planning, and meeting new people.

Rediscovering Childhood: A Journey Through Time and Memory


Embark on a nostalgic journey through time and memory, as we explore the childhood experiences of a writer who grew up in Greater London. From the geese-filled skies to the old three-storey house in Richmond, each memory is a testament to the enduring power of place and time. This memoir not only paints a vivid picture of the past but also reflects on the changes that have occurred over the years. Join us as we delve into these memories and discover how they have shaped the writer's life and work.

The Journey: A Tale of Resilience and Hope


This article delves into the journey of life, exploring the trials and tribulations one faces, and the resilience and hope that keeps us going. It's a reflection on the human condition, the power of words, and the healing that comes from shared experiences. Join us as we traverse this path, finding solace in the shared human experience.

The Awakening of Spring: A Journey Through March 1st


Experience the joy and warmth of the first day of spring through a vivid narrative that captures the essence of tradition, community, and the beauty of nature. This story takes you on a journey through the day, from the first light of dawn to the setting sun, immersing you in the festive atmosphere and the simple pleasures that mark the arrival of spring.

The Moon's Journey: A Tale of Self-Discovery and Renewal


Embark on a celestial journey with the moon as it traverses the darkness to find its light. This tale of self-discovery and renewal mirrors our own life experiences, reminding us of our inherent completeness and the cyclical nature of growth and transformation.

Zermatt: A Journey Through the Swiss Alpine Paradise


Embark on a journey through Zermatt, a world-renowned destination nestled in the heart of the Swiss Alps. From the iconic Matterhorn peak to charming alpine villages, and from adrenaline-pumping winter sports to tranquil summer hikes, discover the beauty and excitement of this Swiss alpine paradise.